Original air date: 29Mar2010
Well good morning! It’s been a while, hasn’t it? It’s unfortunate because there’s been all kinds of things going on that I would have liked to have written about - but life has just been too busy to allow for blogging. (Somewhere in the middle would be nice!) Our most recent adventure was a couple days spent at a little bed & breakfast on the coast up near Ft Bragg, CA (that’s where the flower pics came from - the garden out front of the house at the B&B.) It was a really nice getaway ... right up until the moment I got knocked underwater by a rogue wave -- with my iPhone in my pocket. :( Needless to say, please don’t be sending me any texts anytime soon - I won’t be getting them. So *anyway* - on to cheerier topics! I am thankful and excited to be able to report that I have been feeling much better recently! My worst round of bronchitis ever has finally receded and I back to nearly business as usual. (I wish my poor hubby could kick his cough once and for all though.) I actually went three weeks without any pelvic pain last month -- which is *quite* the record for me in the last many many months (like a year or better.) It’s come back now - in fact, that’s the reason I’m writing this at such a wee hour, I was up and saw every hour on the hour last night, tossing and turning due to a symphony being played by GI cramping, “girl” cramping, and my hips aching. Since I was just laying there staring at the ceiling since about 4:30am, and I had already had a good long conversation with God (those quiet hours of the night are sure great for that,) I figured I may as well get up and get a cup of coffee in me before I meet my friend LaDona here in about 15 minutes to (re-)start our morning walking again. Ahhh, wouldn’t it be nice if Jack had to be at work at 10 -- then we wouldn’t have to go out so early! ;)
So while Danny and I were enjoying the beautiful scenery of the drive and the great company we had (at least that *I* had,) we were having our usual deep conversations about life. One of my favorite things about our relationship is how much sharing and talking and dreaming and analyzing and solving all of the world’s problems that we do. In fact, our whole dating experience is defined by the hours and hours and houuuuurs we spent talking! During the drive yesterday I asked myself a very interesting question, something I had never considered before. It’s one of those questions that really is hypothetical, since my answer one way or the other would change nothing, it’s just interesting to think about. Here’s the question: Do I think I got a “fair trade” for my life, from the life that I had planned on and worked towards and was in the process of living (basically, everything I considered “normal” back then - working as a goldsmith, being very physically active, really being quite healthy,) to what now defines my life? Would I say it was a “fair trade,” that I got the “short end of the stick,” or that I got “the better end of the deal?” I considered the ‘cons’ of my life - the constantly being sick, seeing umpteen doctors regularly and taking umpteen medications daily, all the things I can’t do or end up having to cancel, being hospitalized 5 times in 5 years and facing all the new unknowns about the most recent additions to the disease repertoire ... with the pros of my life, first of all that I get to spend virtually all of my time with my best friend, we are able to focus our time and energy (what I do have) to first and foremost our work in the kingdom. I had to think about the answer a lot less than I thought I would have to. The simple answer is, although there are many very difficult aspects of my life, I really wouldn’t change a thing. I love my life and consider myself really having the better end of the deal. Although I never would have picked this course for my life, I am thankful for what God is doing in my life and the ways that He is shaping me. I have learned things and grown in ways I never could have during my “old life.” I know that my ways are not God’s ways, and that His plan is always better than I could imagine. Of course it doesn’t take me agreeing with Him to make that true, but embracing His plan with an open and moldable heart sure makes a difference in the quality of my life! So thinking about all of this actually led to me thanking God for my illnesses and my conditions this morning, because without them I would not be where I am at now. So many people look back and have regrets about their lives, but that is just somewhere my heart doesn’t go. I know that every terrible decision I made and every way that I jumbled up my life has been rolled together with every *right* decision I made and every way that I have grown to make me the person I am today. If I went back and changed any of that, I would change where I am at now - and that is nothing I am willing to consider. I can honestly say that I have never been truly happier ever before. I might have been more playful or joyful or giggly at times, but I have never had the true spiritual peace, comfort and contentment that I have now. As the apostle Paul said, “I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am ... I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” Phil 4:11-13
Anyway, it has been such a while since I updated this, so I just wanted to jump on here and say hello. Hope you all are doing well! God bless. ♡
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